The capital of ancient city of Indian subcontinent, a beautiful and glamorous place, was called Ayodhya. It lied in the country of Koshala. Koshala was known for its unique and elegant beauty just like the past Indra's well-decorated cities. The city was filled with luxurious surroundings. Large dwellings for thirsty people, beautiful and lavishly decorated diamond, silver, and gold temples and shrines, as well as mountains with rich biodiversity.
Besides the luxurious and rich surroundings, there were other eye-opening and awe-awakening elements in the city. Gardens had all sorts and kinds of birds, lions, and animals like a zoo. Beautiful and exotic flowers were spread apart everywhere in the city. Bees and lotuses were everywhere. Wind blew honey bees and they produced the best-tasting honey. Birds were sitting on people's head and arms and sang occasionally to entertain people (especially women and children). It seemed almost like a Heaven on Earth.
Nevertheless, there were bad and ill elements in the city as well. Demons were also present in the city. Demons were always jealous that they were not getting the same kind of attention. Residents in Ayodhya disliked the wicked and selfish demons, so they looked away when demons came to residents to say hi. Although demons were called demons, they'd rather wanted to be called angels because they wanted to be popular.
Demon of death, Yama, wanted to be popular like the other beautiful creatures in the city. But, he thought he couldn't be liked by all residents and people. So, he decided to find the particular brand of supporters who wouldn't mind his wickedness. Ultimate goal of Yama was to slain Vishvamitra who was some of the most popular gods in the city of Ayodhya. Vishvamitra was always glamorous and well-dressed: he knew how to wear beautiful "swags." Sharp and refined sword, bows, splendidly shining jewels on his neck, head, and arms all signified his self-importance.
Yama hated all the attractiveness Vishvamitra had. So Yama and his ugly and jealous followers and supporters (they look physically ugly like Yama) decided to capture Vishvamitra when he was asleep.
So they did. Vishvamitra, although captured, was also smart and intelligent.
He gave all the glaring armors and jewels to the ugly followers and Yama. While they were paying attention in awe and looking at all of the armors and jewels, Vishvamitra quickly ran away naked and saved his life.
Hanuman, Rama, and Lakshmana fight Ravana. Source: Fighting of gods
Bibliography:
M. Dutt, R. Dutt, Gould, Griffith, Hodgson, Mackenzie, Nivedita, Oman, Richardson, and Ryder.
Author's Note: I created this story of PDE Ramayana in my own version of the story. Original content may be different from my re-created story, so you are advised to visit the website in my bibliography for the original content of the story.
Besides the luxurious and rich surroundings, there were other eye-opening and awe-awakening elements in the city. Gardens had all sorts and kinds of birds, lions, and animals like a zoo. Beautiful and exotic flowers were spread apart everywhere in the city. Bees and lotuses were everywhere. Wind blew honey bees and they produced the best-tasting honey. Birds were sitting on people's head and arms and sang occasionally to entertain people (especially women and children). It seemed almost like a Heaven on Earth.
Nevertheless, there were bad and ill elements in the city as well. Demons were also present in the city. Demons were always jealous that they were not getting the same kind of attention. Residents in Ayodhya disliked the wicked and selfish demons, so they looked away when demons came to residents to say hi. Although demons were called demons, they'd rather wanted to be called angels because they wanted to be popular.
Demon of death, Yama, wanted to be popular like the other beautiful creatures in the city. But, he thought he couldn't be liked by all residents and people. So, he decided to find the particular brand of supporters who wouldn't mind his wickedness. Ultimate goal of Yama was to slain Vishvamitra who was some of the most popular gods in the city of Ayodhya. Vishvamitra was always glamorous and well-dressed: he knew how to wear beautiful "swags." Sharp and refined sword, bows, splendidly shining jewels on his neck, head, and arms all signified his self-importance.
Yama hated all the attractiveness Vishvamitra had. So Yama and his ugly and jealous followers and supporters (they look physically ugly like Yama) decided to capture Vishvamitra when he was asleep.
So they did. Vishvamitra, although captured, was also smart and intelligent.
He gave all the glaring armors and jewels to the ugly followers and Yama. While they were paying attention in awe and looking at all of the armors and jewels, Vishvamitra quickly ran away naked and saved his life.
Bibliography:
M. Dutt, R. Dutt, Gould, Griffith, Hodgson, Mackenzie, Nivedita, Oman, Richardson, and Ryder.
Author's Note: I created this story of PDE Ramayana in my own version of the story. Original content may be different from my re-created story, so you are advised to visit the website in my bibliography for the original content of the story.
Hi Peter,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your story. You did a wonderful job of setting the scene. It almost feels as if we are present in the Indian setting. Excellent work. I also enjoyed your version of the characters. It was fun to watch the story unfold from a different perspective. Great work and I look forward to reading more as the semester progresses.
-Andy McDowell
Hi Peter! I really liked your story and the changes that you made. I thought it was an interesting way to portray the original characters in a language that seemed more modern and easy to read. In future posts, I suggest taking the time to look over your posts after writing them to make sure you don't have any grammatical mistakes that are commonly made. I find myself making them all the time when I am blogging, because I feel so comfortable writing about this subject.... so it can really be a blessing and/or a curse! Good luck this semester!
ReplyDeleteHi Peter!
ReplyDeleteReading your story was a delight because, out of the stories I’ve read for this class yours was one of the strongest in the description department. The way you set the scene using a variety of senses made for a very holistic/filled out backdrop for the ensuing action and plot. The vocabulary you chose, particularly in the beginning, was elegant and effective, illustrating a beautiful sparkling paradise for the reader.
I found myself curious about the backstories behind the protagonist and antagonist, and likewise the motivations of the followers beyond physical appearance. What if, instead of using the descriptors “bad” and “ill”, you used vocab with more detail, like how the beginning was written? Perhaps the current word choice is best, though- maybe the succinct nature of the negatives hammers home the malintent on the characters. Overall, I loved the background description, and wished the same amount words had been given to the primary conflict- though I loved the cleverness of the characters. Nice work!
Hey Peter! I love how your story turned around at the very last minute and Vishvamitra made a last second escape! If you were to revise the story in the future, I would love to see more detail about the escape or maybe you could add in some details about what Vishvamitra did after he ran away so that the story doesn't end so abruptly after the climax, but that is only a suggestion, as I feel like your story now still has a developed plot that ends with a solution to Vishvamitra's problem.
ReplyDeleteHey Peter! I liked the visuals and how you set the stage for the story in the city, you really painted it to be a magical and heavenly place. One thing that I would maybe add is information leading up to when Yama tried to capture Vishvamitra, how he plotted to do it, and how Vishvamitra was able to escape Yama, I felt a little empty inside not knowing all of those things. Otherwise I really enjoyed this story!
ReplyDeleteHey Peter,
ReplyDeletethis was a really great story and I enjoyed getting to read it. The visuals you have made it easy to picture the setting and see it going through my mind while i was reading it. Your word choices were also really good, making it easy for us to stay interested while reading it.